Hurt, Ignored, Used… And Used to It

Hello readers, I am back again after ages of writing this blog. I seriously think that now need to be tamed for more and more posting here, but after all I am a lazy human being meant to break promises. Anyway, today I would like to tell about what I had been up to these days. I researched a bit about human beings and their relationships, specially that they build with someone of opposite sex and here are the findings.

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Let me start with a story, something that most of us must have faced at some point of our lives. You meet a girl somewhere and take her number. Then you behave as a normal guy will do, calls, SMSes and late night chats. Then suddenly one day, the girl stops replying your SMSes all of a sudden, leaving you thinking whats wrong. You call her, no response too. And you then realize that she ignoring you. You have only one question in your mind, why?

We start to frame all the answers we can at that point of time, starting with the best to the worst that can happen. Maybe her phone is silent, maybe her balance got over, maybe she is away or busy, maybe she is angry with me (again why),…. and the last, maybe she has got someone else and wants to forget me.

We all are cynical creatures that feel less and think more. The more we think, the more bad reasons come in our minds and the more we get depressed. At some point, we get so sad that there is only one thing left to do, become a desperate person and start disturbing the person more who is ignoring us.

I am not here to judge what right or whats wrong. I know it really hurts when the person you loves starts ignoring you, I have been innumerable times through situations as thus. Maybe you feel cheated, used and hurt all at the same time and thats whats makes the things worse, the moment you start comparing yourself with a material.

We are not things to be used, like a toilet paper where you use it to clean your shit and throw it away. If you feel that you are being used, I can surely say that you have disrespecting yourselves when you feel so.

Let me tell you another story that will elaborate this more clearly. A certain spiritual guru was giving a speech at some part of India. He took out a 500 bucks note and showed it to the audience and said that those who want the note may raise their hand. A majority of them did. Seeing this, he took the note in his hand and crumbled it and asked the same question again. Same people raised their hand again. This time, the guru threw the crumbled note on the ground, and used his legs, kicked it and asked the same question again. The audience raised their hands again.

The 500 Rs note, though is just a paper, has also got a value attached with it. So no mater how much you crumble and kick it, its value remains the same.

We are also the same, like the note. We have our value which is a currency of our character. So if other people crumble or kick us, their value may get reduced in our eyes, but our remains the same. The biggest mistake someone can make is disrespecting ourselves by feeling we are “used”.

So what do you need to do when someone does something like I said before. Well, the best thing will be just ignore her and move on. Thats the best thing for you and also the other person. And frankly, to say the truth, there is not a dearth of girls in this world, and if you are good enough, chances are you will find a new one soon.

I have had girls in my life before who may have done the same without throwing any reason. Girls do keep secrets, and I must say that they are good at it. Now, I don’t give a f**k of whether people give me attention or ignore me. I am not born to impress them anyway, its my life, its totally their opinion whether they get impressed by my way of living or not.

I don’t ask God as to why people have hurt or ignored me anymore. I know I wont get the answer now, not because I trust God less, but because I know that something better is written in my life after this, during which I will get justified.

Life plays a survival of the fittest theory everywhere, even in relationships. So the people who are best will ultimately stay with you, and those who don’t deserve you will get erased at some where in the timeline of life. So if someone leaves you without any reason, be glad that you have better relationships in life than before.

To those wondering why I am telling all these : This post is specially for some troubled souls and single friends who are feeling out of control in this Valentine’s week when love is everywhere except in their lives. I hope that you will find this useful.

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Saurav Modak
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